Imagine that this blog is a hall of doors. It is very much like life is, or death, or a deck of cards. The choices an individual makes in terms of which door to open, which door to enter, which door to retreat from, and which door to remain in reveal a lot about that person. It is unfortunate, in my belief, that not every path is available to every person.
My own path is not particularly recommended for children or fools.
Sometimes I myself am required to make decisions for others in terms of whom to repel, whom to protect, whom to encourage, whom to flee. Because I have managed to survive until now with a high degree of physical health, youthful appearance, and poise, then it is often assumed by various sorts of persons that I lead the way toward either wealth or destruction.
Those persons try all sorts of ways to endear themselves to me.
Some of them believe that I am in control as to what happens to them.
I am however not always in control as to who is following me.
I am either brilliant or a fool, a criminal or a saint, I would like to know because I am very tired of being victimized and watching innocents who I have inadvertently victimized turn into predators. I do not wish to become a predator and will do anything to avoid that. However, it would appear that there is an excess of prey. Nature abhors a vacuum.
Is there a place for me where I can have peace? Or is my path only destruction for myself and others? Is that latter some bizarre form of “peace”? I wish I knew. Is my freedom in captivity? Or is captivity my only chance at freedom? I wish I had some way to choose my own prison but I do not wish to harm the jailer.