Honesty, when it comes to online dating, is probably not the best policy if the point is quantity of respondents. As for unusual persons who not only appreciate honesty but don’t seek or expect to find a cookie-cutter archetype to paste in their curio cabinets, they don’t tend to remain single for long.
Whereas in person I tend to get plenty of attention, I’ve learned the hard way that such intrepid souls are likely to be terrified and sent running for the hills once they figure out how I’m wired. Those who aren’t are generally operating under media-fueled misconceptions as to what is a “submissive,” and what is a “masochist,” etc., and thereby have me pigeon-holed before I can complete my sentence.
Whereas, in the past, when I was, of course, younger, I never remained single for long myself. Soon after becoming part of a couple, and otherwise parading each other in front of our friends, the questions would start coming: “So, how did you guys meet?”
I have no idea. We didn’t go to a bar, because those places are loaded with train wrecks and alcoholics. We didn’t go to a BDSM club, because those places are like a pit of vipers into which sad sacks are sacrificed and entrants are advised to give up all hope upon entry. We certainly didn’t meet on a personal ad because the actual name of the forum will cause confusion and misconception.
In other words, actually meeting is like finding a restaurant gem. On one hand, in order to keep the place in business, a little “word of mouth” is advisable, but, not so much that the place becomes overrun with poseurs.
Authenticity is a rare and precious thing however during a worldwide economic recession, such a thing is probably too much trouble. Best to just find a standard paper doll. They don’t take up a lot of room and no one will shame you for your choices.
I think that perhaps I need to either employ a matchmaker, give up my cigars, or live on a different world in a different time. On the optimistic front however, soon the snowbirds will start to arrive and at least there will be new blood in the cigar lounges. I can hardly wait.