I get lots of well-meaning advice from nice people who somehow believe that if only I was more like them I would be happy like them. So happy I would be that I would be brimming with equally well-meaning advice to interesting and unusual people such as to urge them to conform to my views, such as to be less interesting.
When it comes to “Dominant” men who would like for me to be a silent and willing body for them to experiment on, and this would magically result in both my own pleasure and theirs, I suspect that the “well-meaning” part is to give me a dose of enough pain that I recoil, regroup, and become even more individualistic and particular. In other words, it is a destructive sort of “tough love” that makes me reconsider seeking a relationship of any sort with anyone.
Whereas, if I am a mere low-hanging ripe piece of fruit desiring to be objectified by someone who is obviously less intelligent than I am, then I am happy to be that compliant bag of flesh. Such an object isn’t concerned about the character of the “Dominant”, and has no care in the world as to what sort of physical or psychological damage is to be enacted. It’s all the same. All men are the same. Might as well do them all.
I assume that such impatient sorts already know themselves to be shallow, uninteresting, and otherwise of no more depth than they hope that I myself lack. By doing them the favor of rejecting them, I can be “the one that got away,” and thereby be either elevated or degraded in myth alone.
My favorite bad, well-meaning advice, is to tell me to “relax,” and “let it happen,” and otherwise ignore my inner voice full of warning signals. I suppose it is useless for me to protest that if I am sure that I want to surrender, I beg for it. I don’t need to be seduced, urged, or persuaded. I certainly don’t need to be manhandled above my objections.
I’d rather earn the right to present my surrendered self to someone who I have come to trust has managed to retain his own self-respect rather than one who thinks of Dominance as the indulgence of an infant reaching out to grasp a toy while having his diaper changed.